October 6, 2009 at 9:11 am 5 comments

You know how some people have the uncanny ability to know when a person is gay?  Perhaps before they even know themselves?  Well, I believe that I have a version of that super-power that enables me to know when someone is expecting, before the pee even dries on the stick.

We have some lovely neighbors accross the street. A couple about our age, married slightly longer then super-husband and I, with no kids. Now, when a couple has been married for seven years (like hubs and I) or longer without children, people start to speculate about you. And I have long speculated that our neighbor friends have had difficulty conceiving.

They moved in a little over a year ago from the same big metropolis that we came from, so we bonded over that.  Since we were already two years into the baby-not-making extravaganza I took careful note of the fact that she was not looking for work here in this new town. And that they had moved here to be closer to family.

Months went by and we had a few dinners together (I took note of her choice of beverages) and after awhile I started to think that maybe they were just one of those couples who didn’t want kids….

A few days I started the meno.pur for my IVF cycle, they went out of town – basically on our dream vacation to the Pacific Northwest. I was jealous… we did not take a vacation this summer because of IVF (and now I am forgoing our planned winter vacation because of IVF #2 but that is another topic..) and there they were, off on a 3 1/2 week trip while I was stuck at home getting shot up with drugs and swelling to epic proportions.

The day after my negative beta I came home from school and she was standing on their front porch.  “Hi!”  she shouted down at me.

“You’re back!  How was your trip?”

“Fantasic,” she said, “Really, really wonderful.”  Her husband came out and joined her on the porch.

“Yah,” he said, putting his arm around her.  “Best vacation ever.” And he gave her a look. And at that point I knew that she was pregnant.

The events since then have just reinforced my suspicions. The bedroom shades have been drawn in the afternoon. I’ve barely seen either of them leave the house. When Super-husband and I caught them headed out to visit family over the weekend, we mentioned how they should really plan to come to a local festival with us this May. They looked at each other. Whispered. Told us they couldn’t.

So, it is still a hunch until I receive confirmation via turning down the glass of wine I offer her. But I think my bump-dar is pretty strong.

There is an underlying question though….  did they use fertility treatments?  They were gone for pretty much the entire length of my IVF once I started stims. Do they have a magic fertility doctor in Oregon?  Because if that is the case, I wouldn’t mind combining IVF #2 with my dream vacation.  How do you ask a question like that?

In other news, my hips are still giving me trouble from the PIO injections. The sensation of my clothes touching the area is still quite painful and any impact my feet make on the ground sends shockwaves of pain up my legs. It does seem to be getting better very very slowly. Or I am just getting used to it. I called my RE’s office and they told me not to worry, that it was most likely nerve damage which would eventually heal. Here’s hoping it is sooner then later!


Entry filed under: everyone is pregnant.

Adventures at the RE Circling, with nowhere to land

5 Comments Add your own

  • 1. Jem  |  October 6, 2009 at 12:45 pm

    Yup. They are definitely pregnant.

    The only way you could ask if they used ART would be if you told them your story, first.


  • 2. Womb For Improvement  |  October 6, 2009 at 2:59 pm

    I have a pretty well-developed bumb-dar too.

    I agree with Jem, only when you open up to them might they tell you their story (+ number of a great clinic).

  • 3. Io  |  October 6, 2009 at 9:29 pm

    Heh – I love this new term! Yeah, I think my bumpdar is pretty well tuned as well. Even so, I’m always thrown off balance even when I suspected…
    I third the thought to tell them your story. Just a casual drop into conversation about injections that aren’t heroin or something.

  • 4. Kate (Bee In The Bonnet)  |  October 8, 2009 at 10:52 am

    Yeah. Bump-dar. I so know what you mean. And yeah, your neighbors are probably knocked up, if you’re sensing it.

    And wow. Nerve damage from the PIO shots? Damn, that just SUCKS.

  • 5. Pundelina  |  October 13, 2009 at 7:14 am

    Fourthing the tell them your tale and see what falls out in the wash motion here.

    Ouchie for your poor sore hips – hopefully the nerves will right themselves over the next month.

    And, there’s something for you over on my blog!



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After 5 IUIs, 2 IVFs, and the diagnosis of diminished ovarian reserve at the ripe old age of 29, I am now looking for information on embryo donation and adoption. I'm taking a break from blogging but will return when our path out of the world of IF becomes more clear.

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