She Exists!

May 6, 2009 at 11:11 am 3 comments

I know, I announced I was back and then I disappeared again. I certainly appreciate everyone who has stuck with me despite my flakyness as of late.

The good news is when you are not actively TTC there is actually something new to report when you only post about once a month!  And this month’s news is a bang up bit of news at that.

Last week I had a recurrance of the infections and this time went to my RE instead of urgent care. He wrote me some new scripts and then took advantage of his captive audience and told me that he was done doing IUIs, that he officially reccomended IVF.

Naturally, this didn’t really register anything with me, because we can’t afford to do anything anyway! And I casually mentioned this to my mom who up and asked me how much IVF cost. I looked up the charges for my clinic and shared them with her. And the result?  Well, it turns out that my dad just received an inheritence from his mother who passed away, and it happens to be the same amount as my clinic’s shared risk program.

So, I have the greenlight from them to do shared risk (three attempts, then money back minus cost of drugs if there is no “take home baby”) whenever I want.

Yah, I had a hard time scraping my jaw up off the floor from that one too.

So now it’s really all on hubby… whenever he is ready to start we will. And he is coming around. It’s all quite crazy really, how much things can change over the course of a month.

It’s nice knowing I have IVF on the horizon, and I can fully enjoy spring until then. Without the pressure of TTC.

In other news, we went camping at the beach two weekends back and had a lovely time. We took advantage of being near super-husband’s brother and stopped in to meet their new baby and I got to hold my first niece for the first time. And she really is lovely and precious and all good things and oh how I want to give her a little cousin.

I expected to feel all sad and bitter, and I certainly shed a few tears on the way there. But once I met her that faded away. I don’t want THIS baby, though I already love her to pieces… I just want my own baby. Anyway, I am glad I took the plunge and met her, because now I can start knitting her cute little baby pants w/ no bitterness.  And she gives me the motivation to hold my breath and take the plunge into IVF.

Here I come!!!


Entry filed under: life.

The last CD-1 Pondering the Future

3 Comments Add your own

  • 1. Kate (Bee In The Bonnet)  |  May 6, 2009 at 11:23 am

    Wow! That is awesome news! What a lucky happenstance that you get to be the beneficiary (by proxy) of your grandmother. How very, very cool.

    And I’m glad you got to meet your niece, too. There is something comforting in taking that plunge into waters that could be very upsetting, and coming out feeling totally fine.

  • 2. womb for improvement  |  May 6, 2009 at 3:54 pm

    What a difference a month makes. And I totally understand the niece thing – exactly how I feel about my two nephews.

  • 3. annacyclopedia  |  May 6, 2009 at 4:06 pm

    Thanks for the update – I do think of you and wonder how you are. I’m thrilled for you that you are having this chance thanks to your grandmother and your parents’ generosity. May this be the beginning of only good news to come.


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After 5 IUIs, 2 IVFs, and the diagnosis of diminished ovarian reserve at the ripe old age of 29, I am now looking for information on embryo donation and adoption. I'm taking a break from blogging but will return when our path out of the world of IF becomes more clear.

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